Previously on The 100: Sanctum was colonized by four families, the Primes: We have the same blood, Clarke; Rose has been taken; People in the woods want us dead; Children of Gabriel gather ’round; death to Primes!! Let’s take their guns and go; You crazy, Octavia; “I should’ve died in that gorge anyway.”
We begin this week with Diyoza showing her unborn baby about survival skills. She’s suddenly “rescued” by three people riding motorcycles. I use quotes there, because Diyoza is not in need of rescue at all. Ever. (Except for that one time when Maddie had to save her a couple weeks ago.) Anyway, they offer her a safe place and a happily ever after with her child, in exchange for helping Russell free Rose. (I like this clandestine plan… Russell going behind his wife’s back to work with Diyoza makes me like him even more than I did.)
Jordan and Delilah, soon to be Priyah7 (HBHN), are chatting post-coitus. They have a tender discussion where he confesses that he spent his whole life on a ship. He tells her, “It was just us and faces behind glass. People I couldn’t talk to and friends I couldn’t have.” He wanted “this,” meaning human interaction with someone (not his parents) and sexy times. His parents understood him going into cryo though, which is good. Priya7 reminds him all parents have to let kids go. Jordan, though, feels guilty for becoming a face behind the glass for his parents.
Aw. This Jordan is pretty cool. Also: Jordan works out.
Now join us for the Naming Day Festivities! Apparently, Sanctum has its own Martha Stewart, because Naming Day looks a hella lot like a wedding — right down to the four-tiered Tiffany blue cake with decorative swirls. There’s a lot of bustling around, and then Doctor Cillian shows up to check out Clarke’s injured hand. And to check out Clarke. Flirty banter ensues. Maddie arrives in time to to say two things: Doctor Cillian is cute, and she wants to go to school. Clarke nixes that real quick. She reminds her of the huge responsibilities Maddie has as Nightblood Commander, but hey, she can take out the chip and step down if she really wants.
So, within a minute Clarke has successfully stated that Maddie should and should not be Commander. Talk about mixed signals. Is it possible that Diyoza may be a better mother than Clarke? Yes, it is. Maddie agrees to go train and manages to leave the room without stomping her feet and slamming the door. I’m sure that’ll happen in future episodes.
Later, Russell and his wife, Simone, show up to Naming Day dressed like President Snow and someone from the Capitol. He recites the four tenents of Sanctum: Repent, Renew, Rejoice, Rebirth. He begins the process of making amends by apologizing to Kaylee. It seems he takes responsibility for getting her family by Diyoza up on the Elegius IV. Hugging. Crying. Forgiveness. We’re good.
The repenting continues as Clarke tries to make up with Raven. You can imagine how that goes. Raven compares her to Octavia, but at least Octavia “doesn’t pretend to feel bad about it.”
Raven snaps and swishes her way to the machine shop. (Okay, so maybe that part’s not onscreen but in my head.) There she is drawn to, in no particular order, a photo of the Primes, a broken down motorcycle, Riker. Lucky for Riker, Raven knows it’s a fuel intake problem. (With the bike, not Riker.) Neither of them are into the party scene, so together, they work on the bike.
Has Raven already forgotten about Shaw? Or is she just happy to get her hands dirty again?
Soon, we learn Naming Day has several parts to it. Part Two? RAVE!!! Is that Coldplay or U2 they’re playing? Doesn’t matter — Cute Doctor Cillian is forcing Clarke to awkwardly dance to it while Bellamy watches from the sidelines. While I consult Tunefind and learn it’s Rufus Du Sol singing, Bellamy reinforces his humanity to Echo, who’s sneaked in and caught him watching Clarke. He reminds her they lost their friends a matter of days ago and wonders why she doesn’t feel more. Their chemistry is definitely off, and that’s all I’m going to say about that.
Meanwhile, Octavia and L’il Rose are being shuffled from here to there by the Children of Gabriel, on their way, presumably, to meet “the old man.” Rose is scared. Octavia is not. In an uncharacteristic move, Octavia helps Rose overcome her fear. “Just keep your eyes closed and keep saying ‘I’m not afraid.’” L’il Rose, for her part, complies. (I’m pretty sure she’s still scared though.)
Octavia and Rose almost make it away, but they’re caught…until Diyoza & Co. save them from the Children of Gabriel. There’s a fight with guns and weapons, and oh no, kru. RIP L’il Rose. We hardly knew ye. Not for nothin’, Octavia looks upset about it. This is another example of The 100 writers zigging when I expect zags. I truly thought L’il Rose was going to be the plot device for Octavia’s redemption. She wasn’t.
Diyoza realizes her happily ever after is not happening now. Octavia realizes one of the CoG got away. She reports the CoG follow an “old man,” and Diyoza quickly puts two and two together and gets a new deal! If she kills the old man, Russell will have to honor his original deal. So, ladies and gents, we now have Team Octoza! Or Ditavia? Maybe just call them “RUN!” because seriously. Anyway, they are on the murder trail together now. “The devils from Earth become the heroes of Sanctum. Easy peasy.”
Riker the Biker is a Prime, and he’s late for the Naming. He wants to give Raven a ride. ON HIS MOTORCYCLE, people. Get your heads out of the gutter.
No wait, don’t. Because Clarke and Cute Doctor Cillian are, ahem, missing the ceremony on account of being naked and all.
Finally, the Naming Day Ceremony of Actual Naming (trademark: me) is going down. Delilah receives the greatest honor of Sanctum and is so named Priyah7 (HBHN). I think Riker the Biker is also about to be renamed, but not before Priyah7 runs to give Jordan a final kiss as the audience ooohs and ahhhhs. “Don’t let me be a face behind the glass,” she says as she disappears into a sooper sekrit chamber.
Hm. Wondering what’s about to happen up in there. We’ll find out after the commercial break.
And we’re back. Clarke and Cute Doctor Cillian are cuddling. But he’s hiding a book from her. He quotes The Crucible, which is banned in their society. Ugh. Then he gets to the point: there are two sides to every story. “Not everyone in Sanctum believes in the Divinity of the Primes.” What? I know, I’m shocked too.
Clarke quickly recognizes his book is full of sketches and she’s thinking, “YOU SKETCH!? I SKETCH TOO! WE’RE MEANT TO BE!” Then she realizes the subject of his sketches are Night Bloods. Ruh-roh. Clarke has gone and slept with the enemy! He’s def a Child of Gabriel, and he def knocks her out with a paralytic.
Pan to Priyah7 (HBHR) who releases “the fire (balloon lanterns) to purify Sanctum.” Googly-eyed Jordan runs to her, only to be stopped by some thug guards. She looks at Jordan like he’s a stranger then runs to hug Riker the Biker, saying “My beautiful baby boy!” Well, I’ll be damned… when they mean Priyah the Seventh, they mean literally the seventh body who has contained Priyah. Poor Jordan.
Also, poor Clarke. Nope. Make that poor Cute Doctor Cillian. When he’s almost taken over by thug guards, who’ve found Clarke immobilized, he slits his own throat rather than be captured as a traitor. That is commitment, folks! I admit I didn’t see that coming. Thought he’d have more time to play out. So long Doctor Cillian, we hardly knew ye also.
Over in Plot B: Bellamy tries to make amends with Echo. He apologizes to her at the tavern. They discuss all the trauma Echo has been through. She tells a story about her mother telling her not to cry when she was captured. (The unstated theme of this episode is clearly mothering.) Echo is a touch more sympathetic now, at least to Bellamy anyway. They’re moving forward, not back, okay? Kiss. Amends done. Carry on.
Immobilized Clarke has been taken to Russell and Simone’s sooper sekrit chamber. They discuss and do a lot of math. (I hate math.) See, now that L’il Rose is dead, they have no host for their own baby girl. The next in line’s brain would not be mature for another 56 years, and who wants to wait that long, right? The decision is made: Clarke is a Night Blood. Clarke will be reborn as their daughter. All they have to do is kill her.
Simone prepares for “insertion” and Russell “gets rid of the host,” meaning Clarke. At least he apologizes and says she’ll be at peace, before he commits murder. What was it I was saying about liking him just a few paragraphs ago? WRITERS!! Anyway, Clarke’s heart beat slows…slows…stops…fade to black.
“Here she comes.”
“Josephine, can you hear me?”
Um. Yes. Josephine can hear you. And she loves her blonde hair and thinks she can work with her killer bod.
Clarke is gone, y’all. GONE.
And I don’t even know what else to say, other than kudos to Eliza Taylor for the instant change from Clarke to Josephine. Even her body language is different. This is going to be some ride.
Catch The 100 Tuesdays 8/7 central on The CW. I’ll see you next week. Until then, I’ll just be here staring at you from my computer — you know, the face in the glass.