‘Riverdale’: The Best One-Liners From Season 6A

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With Riverdale officially coming to an end after the upcoming seventh season on Wednesday, March 29, it’s time to look back at some of the best moments from the show. In the midst of the craziness, the show has been known to have some pretty great and iconic lines, so we are taking a look back at those in our one-liners series, continuing with the first half of season 6!

“Chapter Ninety-Six: Welcome to Rivervale”

Colin Bentley/The CW
  • Narrator Jughead: “The name of this place is Rivervale.”
  • Narrator Jughead: “We’re just getting started.”
  • Archie: “Yeah, the weirdest part is that we were living in a town called Riverdale.”
  • Archie: “Is the world crazy, or am I?”
  • Betty: “That’s a little barbaric.”
  • Cheryl: “Now leave my land, heathens.”
  • Cheryl: “I’d be obsessed with me, too.”
  • Toni: “I’m sorry, but there’s no chance in Hell I’m letting you put a frickin’ frog in my baby’s mouth.”
  • Jughead: “It’s just an itsy-bitsy spider.”
  • Jughead: “Shades of Creepshow.”
  • Veronica: “I’ve always wanted to make it on a bed full of money.”

Honorable Mention

Cheryl: “Their blood is the seed. Their blood is what nourishes the ground and the furrows. Their blood is what will bring Rivervale back to its glory.”

“Chapter Ninety-Seven: Ghost Stories”

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  • Cheryl: “What are you talking about, boy child?”
  • Cheryl: “Because some water nymph out of an M. Night Shyamalan is stalking the hills of Thornhill and threatening them.”
  • Tabitha: “How completely ghoulish.”
  • Veronica: “You lying cad!”
  • Jughead: “We lived to tell the tale.”

“Chapter Ninety-Eight: Mr. Cypher”

Kailey Schwerman/The CW
  • Alice: “Oh, spare me the spin, Veronica.”
  • Alice: “I’m here to sniff out evil.”
  • Reggie: “If anyone can outwit the devil, Ronnie, it’s you.”
  • Veronica: “All grown up and still a sleazeball.”
  • Jughead: “Who knew the devil would be so literal?”
  • Jughead: “I’m nothing if I”m not a writer.”
  • Betty: “I’m the Whore of Babylon from the Book of Revelation?”
  • Narrator Jughead: “Because if Rivervale really is going to be the final battleground between good and evil … was anyone’s soul safe?”

“Chapter Ninety-Nine: The Witching Hour(s)”

KIernan Shipka in ‘Riverdale.’ Kailey Schwerman/The CW
  • Poppy: “Oh pooh, Bitsy.”
  • Fen: “War makes all men bedfellows.”
  • Kirk: “We know you’re a communist.”
  • Bitsy: “You’re just a sad, jealous, sexually repressed spinster.”
  • Cheryl: “Look at what the black cat dragged in.”
  • Sabrina: “Happy-sad endings are the best.”
  • Sabrina: “There is no death for witches.”

“Chapter One Hundred: The Jughead Paradox”

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  • Narrator Jughead: “Archie Andrews has somehow come back from the dead.”
  • Narrator Jughead: “The great Pop’s Chock’lit Shoppe in the sky.”
  • Betty: “The whole town was sacrificing you.”
  • Tabitha: “So, we live in a parallel universe?”
  • Veronica: “I was so distraught, we had to cancel the Jonas Brothers performance.”
  • Veronica: “The irony is, Veronica Lodge is more woman than either of you can handle alone.”
  • Veronica: “I am so done with this macho, toxic, competitive bull crap.”
  • Veronica: “Let’s make out to save the universe.”
  • Veronica: “Here’s to Vughead becoming canon.”
  • Cheryl: “It doesn’t, you ghoul-lunatic.”
  • Jughead: “You had a funeral for him, and then you talked to his corpse for months.”
  • Jughead: “It’s a universe of high school dances, and masked serial killers, of football, and milkshakes, and musicals, and cults, diabolical board games, and murderous nuns.”

Honorable Mention:

Reggie Prime: “So, you’re saying he’s me?”

Reggie: “No, bro, you’re me. There is no you, all right?”

“Chapter One Hundred and One: UNBELIEVABLE”

Michael Courtney/The CW
  • Kevin: “Amen to that.”
  • Tabitha: “And pound those nails into Hiram Lodge’s coffin.”
  • Cheryl: “I believe a new Age of Wonderment is upon us.”
  • Cheryl: “Time to catch this septuagenarian saboteur crimson-handed.”
  • Betty: “Um, I can see people’s energy, if it’s threatening, like their auras.”
  • Betty: “Fly away, little bird.”
  • Archie: “Betty, I’m getting heavier, denser.”
  • Nana Rose: “We must perform a banishment.”
  • Hermosa: “You’re a marked woman.”

“Chapter One Hundred and Two: Death at a Funeral”

Bettina Strauss/The CW
  • Nana Rose: “That’s because I transferred Abigail’s soul from your body into my granddaughter’s via an arcane ritual.”
  • Reggie: “So, should I say I’m sorry for your loss or congratulations?”
  • Betty: “I found most of him; including his head.”

“Chapter One Hundred and Three: The Town”

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  • Percival: “Poverty begets more poverty, begets drugs, begets crime, begets more crime until no one is safe.”
  • Jughead: “And thus began the battle for Riverdale’s soul.”
  • Jughead: “Don’t punch me.”
  • Jughead: “They’re small, but they’re swanky.”
  • Heraldo: “Where’s the body?”
  • Archie: “It turns out Jug can read minds since the explosion.”

“Chapter One Hundred and Four: The Serpent Queen’s Gambit”

Bettina Strauss/The CW
  • Veronica: “We aim to please.”
  • Jughead: “Classic superhero narrative.”
  • Abigail: “Honestly, I’d be more worried about an angry mob dragging me into the forest in the middle of the night and burning me at the stake.”
  • Abigail: “Spoken like a true villain.”
  • Abigail: “Just the he-man I was looking for.”
  • Veronica: “But, the male Mary Poppins is definitely up to some serious shadiness.”
  • Betty: “Cheryl, dressed as a Ghoulie, threw a Molotov cocktail at you?”
  • Britta: “I’m sure you won’t believe me, but Mistress Cheryl is asleep, and her ancestor Abigail Blossom has possessed her body, and she’s been trying to kill people.”

“Chapter One Hundred and Five: Folk Heroes”

Jack Rowand/The CW
  • Betty: “How do you fight mind control?”
  • Betty: “Set her ass on fire!”
  • Cheryl: “Nana, poor Darius has burned to a crisp.”
  • Cheryl: “I’m literally boiling alive!”
  • Veronica: “You’re definitely banished from my bed.”
  • Percival: “No rest for the wicked, it seems.”

“Chapter One Hundred and Six: Angels in America”

Colin Bentley/The CW
  • Jughead: “Once a safe haven, always a safe haven.”
  • Tabitha: “An angel who just happens to look like my boyfriend?”
  • Tabitha: “He kept turning up like the ultimate bad penny.”
  • Raphael: “There are some men whose hearts are so cold, they burn down villages just for the warmth.”

Honorable Mention:

Tabitha: “But make no mistake, it is the apocalypse we’re talking about. In Riverdale. And we are sitting at ground zero.”

Keep a lookout for our next article in the Riverdale one-liners series! In the meantime, watch all six seasons of Riverdale now on Netflix. Check out our other coverage on the series here. Season 7 premieres on Wednesday, March 29 at 9 p.m. EST on The CW.

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