The Hargreeves are living in the 60s, 10 days before the Apocalypse, a new one. Five is trying to one, locate all of his siblings, and then two, somehow convince them to run off with him to try and save the world. It’s not going well. Luther said no thanks and Diego has escaped a mental institution to God knows where. Klaus is driving back to Dallas, and Allison and Vanya are both seemingly living quiet, peaceful lives. Which of his siblings will Five find next?
Flashback to Hazel killing The Handler from season 1 (a high-ranking member of the Temps Commission, Five worked for her, she was very set in letting the Apocalypse happen, remember her?) Oh wait, she isn’t dead? Good thing she said something, she was about to be Handled Toast. She returns to her office and there sits AJ in her chair (AJ is a goldfish, with his bowl attached to a body … who talks and smokes … FYI), he’s demoting her. She’s now sitting at Five’s old desk in the bullpen. Oop.
Back to Five and Luther at the club, Luther lets loose that he works for the gangster Jack Ruby, the guy who shot Oswald. Five reminds him that he’s number one, numero uno, but Luther doesn’t care, he refuses to re-team up with his brother. I mean let’s be honest, he is kind of a disaster magnet. Luther then bounces the man housing Vanya, Carl, who drops his wallet. Five reaches into his pocket, looking for some cash to throw on the bar but instead finds the little box Hazel shoved in there before his untimely death; it’s a film box labeled “The Frankel Footage.”
Vanya goes to grab drunk as a skunk Carl and Luther grabs his lost wallet from the club floor. As he goes to return it, Luther spots Vanya driving away in Carl’s car.
The white-haired crew have honed in on Allison now, who’s comfortable at home with her husband. The door busts down and it’s the police there to arrest Raymond for “assault and battery” — the man from earlier that night that Allison had shoved out the door. She allows them to take him, deciding not to use her reality-bending powers as Raymond assures her everything is fine. Does he know what she can do? The white-haired gang decide now isn’t the time, and as they drive away one starts to chug a shimmering white liquid …
The next day, Five is back with Elliott, asking him to develop the film from Hazel. Elliott has a police scanner (because of course he does) and a call for “fugitives on the run” comes through — Diego?
Yeah, it’s Diego. He’s still trying to kill Lee Harvey Oswald, and him and Lila are devising their master plan. Lila says let’s just kill him, but Diego can’t kill a man who hasn’t committed a crime, he wants to chop off his trigger finger instead. As she so eloquently puts it, “that’s stupid.” Poof! Five arrives in the backseat. Diego doesn’t want to go with him (sensing a trend here) but Five has the leg up on Diego, he’s a wanted man with a nice reward on his head. So Diego (regrettably) agrees and brings Lila with him.
Allison can’t get to her husband down at the city jail, and no one is helping her to no surprise. But, oh look who’s in the cell next to Raymond. It’s Klaus, who has seemingly garnered some kind of cult like following as a man tossed into the cell with him bows down at his feet, crediting him for changing his life.
Don’t go chasing waterfalls, stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to. -A nugget of wisdom from Klaus, and TLC.
Raymond and Klaus get caught up in conversation before Klaus is let free after a call from the governor, clearly he’s made some friends.
What is on that old film from Hazel? When Five, Diego, and Lila return to Elliott’s he approaches with a gun after seeing what was on it, asking if they were an “enemy of the people.” They don’t really have a good answer … Five and Diego disarm him with ease, obviously, and tie him up as they watch the footage. It’s from November 22, 1963, which is six days into the future. It’s some footage from the Kennedy assassination. Their father was there.
Luther drives out to Vanya’s, a gun on his passenger seat, memories of the destruction at her hand flashing behind his eyes. He finds her in the barn, and it turns out she’s got some amnesia. She remembers no one, nothing, she’s a blank slate. He confesses that he failed her, he failed everyone, and he’s sorry. Sissy comes up behind him with a shotgun, she sees the handgun in the waist of his pants. He returns Carl’s wallet to her and leaves.
Okay, honestly, what is with these white-haired dudes? One is cooking fish, the other two are throwing knives at each other? With no reactions? A note comes in via tube, much like they did to Cha-Cha and Hazel from the Temps Commission in season 1, labeled “The Swedes.” A photo of Vanya is enclosed.
Diego and Five are arguing about their dad’s presence on the grassy knoll, the grassy knoll. Diego says what they’re all thinking — that their dad killed JFK. The brothers break out a fossil, a phone book, searching for their father’s Dallas address, and they find it under D.S. Umbrella Manufacturing Company. Diego has to comfort Lila and ensure her that he isn’t losing his marbles, he never was, and that this is real, even if it seems strange.
Back at the city jail, Allison has finally been allowed to see Raymond. He’s reassuring her everything will be fine. He asked her why she said “I heard a rumor” last night, so he doesn’t know what she can do … and she doesn’t tell him. Time’s up. As she’s leaving, she spots something very familiar, Klaus’ hand tattoos, on someone else (the same guy from earlier with Klaus). She asks where he got them, and he responds that all the “children of the prophet have them.”
Cue the prophet. Klaus breaks into a large and lavish house, walking through as if he knows exactly where he’s going. A giant portrait of him, in the likeness of well, a prophet, hanging on the wall kind of gives away this place was once his.
Vanya still can’t place how she knows Luther, or why he’d apologized to her. As she tries to sleep that night, moments of her previous life begin to trickle in, a flash of her fingers on a violin, then a blast hitting Luther — is it all coming back? She leaves Sissy and Carl’s house.
D.S. Umbrella Manufacturing Company. Diego and Five have found it. It’s been 45 years since Five has seen his father, and he’s a bit … on edge about it. The brothers figure out pretty quick that D.S. Umbrellas is a front, and split up to try and figure out for what. Five finds a few remarkably creepy set ups of a quintessential suburbia families in their homes, except they’re mannequins, (cringe) and an invite to a Gala made up for Mr. Hoyt Hillenkoetter and the Consulate General of Mexico in Dallas, which he pockets. Diego finds a desk with some dusty folders before a bump sends him off away from the files outside, where a mysterious figure is walking away into the fog. Another bump pulls Five away from his investigation as well.
Five finds a chimp, assuming he’s the late Pogo in his early stages he greets him happily, but that glee isn’t returned. The chimp whacks him in the neck and jumps out of a window, taking off. Diego is still stalking his mysterious man, and he finds him. They start in on some close combat, Diego’s specialty, and the man shockingly goes toe-to-toe with him.
Diego goes down clutching his stomach wound as Sir Reginald Hargreeves walks off, the maybe baby Pogo joining him.
What the heck Papa Hargreeves? What are you even doing? So many questions, so few answers … yet. All 10 episodes of The Umbrella Academy are streaming now on Netflix.